Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
