you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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