He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
