I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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