Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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