Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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