Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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