you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
