no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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