If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
