Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
