I showed him my bush... on skype.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
