By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize