My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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