I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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