so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
