sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize