Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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