Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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