got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
