Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
