Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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