We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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