Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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