ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize