seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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