I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Don't make out with my wife yet
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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