how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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