so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
