why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
