READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
