I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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