i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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