Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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