She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I want to be your penis for a week.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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