I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Randomize
