she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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