u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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