plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
