yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
A bitchslap is in order.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
