she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
