I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
