Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
