it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
