And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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