So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
