ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
