i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
