Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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