So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Just pee around me
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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